Unconditional positive regard

When I really want to engage in the process of empathy, it is necessary to forget my EGO and maintain a stance of unconditional positive regard, love and acceptance of the other. As a coach I can build ‘rapport’ with my client if I am able to maintain an attitude of refraining from judgment.

How much am I aware of how important is to make ’empty space’ to welcome my client?

How can I shift attention to my internal dialogue in order to move towards him and become a ‘mirror’?

How am I sure I mirroring himself and send back to my client his/her thoughts, desires, wishes and sources?

How clear is my soul to reflect his/her thoughts and potential?


Where does it come from?



you do not believe in yourself?

you are scared about future?

you find so difficult to realize your dreams?

you feel stuck?

you do not know what to do?


Coaching is the adventure to move forward and to discover another layer of your wonderful personality.


I have walked through many lives,

some of them my own,

and I am not who I was,

though some principle of being

abides, from which I struggle

not to stray.

When I look behind,

as I am compelled to look

before I can gather strength

to proceed on my journey,

I see the milestones dwindling

toward the horizon

and the slow fires trailing

from the abandoned camp-sites,

over which scavenger angels

wheel on heavy wings.

Oh, I have made myself a tribe

out of my true affections,

and my tribe is scattered!

How shall the heart be reconciled

to its feast of losses?

In a rising wind

the manic dust of my friends,

those who fell along the way,

bitterly stings my face.

Yet I turn, I turn,

exulting somewhat,

with my will intact to go

wherever I need to go,

and every stone on the road

precious to me.

In my darkest night,

when the moon was covered

and I roamed through wreckage,

a nimbus-clouded voice

directed me:

“Live in the layers,

not on the litter.”

Though I lack the art

to decipher it,

no doubt the next chapter

in my book of transformations

is already written.

I am not done with my changes.

Stanley Kunitz, “The Layers” from The Collected Poems of Stanley Kunitz. Copyright © 1978 by Stanley Kunitz.  Reprinted by permission of W. W. Norton & Company, Inc.
Source: The Collected Poems of Stanley Kunitz (W. W. Norton and Company, Inc., 2002)